There's no home for Singles

A phenomenon that has always existed in our country but becomes a life changing experience sometimes in a city like Mumbai..where you breath and your neighbour can feel your breath as we all live in such close quarters of each other.. the concept of privacy is a far cry in this city..

But my post is going to primarily concentrate on student (hostel) / tenant vows that one has to face in this city.. as a working professional few years ago i was glad to find a PG which at least gave me the freedom of flexi time and doing my own thing.. but yes even there we were not allowed to bring our 'boy friends' (the gender male) into our PG premises as people in the buildings around would talk.. since ours was an all girls PG.. it was automatically labelled the excuse my language 'Hore House'. And i never understood how such biased perceptions could exist without knowing any reality about those women.. The same was the case with my Hostel as it was an all girls hostel of about 500 women in a prime location in Mumbai and i remember when i was being sent there, my dad had got incessant calls from all his so called concerned friends asking him to re - think his decision because apparently my hostel was famous for a whole lot of 'absurd stories'.. My dad's reaction then was 'i know my daughter and i know she knows where to draw the line.. she will figure what's right'.. and thank god for that as i spent one of the best 3 years of my life amongst a bunch of few of my closest friends today.. The experience that hostel gave me due to it's sheer size, population and variety of people i could interact with, no other place has or maybe will be able to give me..

Other facets of the this phenomenon are much worse and painful.. In Mumbai when you take flats on rent, your neighbours automatically become your moral guardians. They start deciding as to who should and who should not walk out of your home and at what hour.. A lot of people do not rent out their apartments to singles as a rule.. but if you are married, you automatically apparently become human and normal and so it's all good.. this attitude has led to a whole lot of my friends leaving this city.. being thrown out of their houses absurdly.. to a point where a friend of mine never got his deposit back (and that's a hell lot of money) because the owner - a middle aged single woman found a reason not to give it back since the neighbours had complained about him and she was throwing him out.. and when he obviously asked for his deposit back she went to the extent of saying she would cry RAPE.. i was aghast at the extent to which people can do this whole moral brigade nonsense and then lose their own.. suddenly the society wakes up and complains for people being thrown out as they suddenly fear and Alien (note single boy or girl) take over their society.. Just keeps reminding me of the hypocritical society we live in..

Being Single automatically questions your conduct because you suddenly have girls and boys coming into your house and at absurd hours apparently.. i see no reason why someone can decide how anyone should live their lives.. yes i do understand considering the space constraint in this city the noise factor is a big one and so till the time a bunch of guys and girls are not disturbing you in any external way i see no reason as to why and what are you doing noticing his or her daily schedule and living or commenting on any of that..

India in the name of culture lives in this hypocritical society where they run a moral brigade when if we start looking in to each of these people's houses maybe they themselves will have a gazillion things to be ashamed of.. Why can't these neighbours (and i don't deny there are few people who definitely are like that) look at these students or working professionals as people who are living away from their homes and therefore need to have a life beyond what they already do. They have come here to learn to live life on their own and the least one can do is make it a little easier for them rather than question every move they make because their parents back home are there to take care of such issues and figure it out within their fold without needing any needling from unknown strangers.. Neighbours need to realise that they are as much a stranger to these boys/girls and Men/women and vice versa.

It's a long shot to hope in this city for things to change but i can only hope that people and slowly and steadily realise that they need to mind their own business and that's all it takes..

Censorship or Dictatorship on viewership choice

Off late it has becoming increasingly annoying to watch English movies on TV.. Suddenly it seems like Indian television is regressing rather than progressing.. Every second word seems to be beeped and whats even more annoying are the subtitles because i see more asterix marks than words there and sometimes i'm dumbfounded to see words like DUMB ASS being changed in the subtitles to either an asterix or stupid words like fool.. Who are we KIDDING here really? your kid's will learn those words even before you know it. This doesn't mean i support the fact that today's kids seem to be a little too exposed to abuses and many other concepts of life much before their age.. but movies. it changes the essence of the entire story sometimes because of those beeps and edited scenes..

The scarier part is recently i was watching the movie HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU on one of the channels and it was one of those prime time 9 o'clock slots and the film was edited immensely. The movie has nothing more than few kissing scenes and believe it or not all and i mean all the kissing scenes were deleted from the movie.. after a point you just would not understand what was happening in the movie because it would randomly jump into another scene.. for heaven's sake it's a romantic comedy, what do you expect? people sitting across tables and talking. absolutely nothing vulgar in that movie and still had to go through that fate in the name of censorship.. aren't suddenly a bunch of fools therefore sitting and deciding the choices for each one of us? it scares me because suddenly i feel i am going back in time rather than moving forward..because i was used to watching movies in their proper shape size and language and suddenly there seem to be this moralistic group of people who walk into our lives and decide what we should and should not watch..While i know channels also want viewership and therefore adhere by the censorship rules but give me a break.. please do not decide what i need to watch and how to this extent where TV viewing becomes a painful pastime.. It's completely understood that there are certain things that need to be censored but this is way too much..

Channels should be given the rite to label it above 18 like it used to be in the old times on all the channels and play the movies as is.. and if need be let these movies be late night bands not that it would stop any of the kids in our country from figuring out their knowledge data.. in the world of Internet i don't think any kid today is away from trash exposure and so it's best left on parents to be friends with their kids and explain things to them rather than such petty and small ways of trying to guard them..there are gazillion munni badnaam's and shiela ki jawaani's to which kid's will be made to dance away to glory across the country because parent's are so proud to see their kids dancing then why this bias towards English content.. let's be adults and accept that every place in the world has their own culture and therefore it's best respected rather than questioned..

The censorship board for television needs to realize this and STOP ruling our lives.

Image Source: Google

Memories re - visited..

Moments and memories long gone..ones you barely think of in your busy life.. work, home, family.. and the day is over you think.. but one meeting with old friends and it all comes fleeting back to you..

Today was one of those days for me.. I finally made the effort to meet few of my old school juniors / friends who happen to be in the city and who i in my busy schedule just never ended up meeting earlier.. it was a pleasant 3 hours.. over beer in Gokul and some great cheap food in Baghdadi.. conversations ranging from whats happening in each of our lives to what million other common friends were up to and where were they..some i have lost touch with and some they have but collective information finally all on one table.. teachers and memories of various school time punishments and notorious activities that in used to make us proud..

At the end of it all i came back home beaming and unloaded my husband with the million stories we discussed this evening.. and it made me realize the importance of taking a break.. keeping in touch with the best memories of life.. because it only makes the present far more valuable because days back have a big hand in making you what you are today.. it's worth the effort to stop and breath instead of the constant run we are on otherwise in our day to day life because apparently we have GROWN UP.. :)

flip flip with flipkart

My affair with Flipkart started about two years back. I have always been an obsessive book buyer and it wouldn't do much to my pockets by the end of it because every time i would walk into a bookstore i would definitely walk out with a book or two and i still do but to keep pace with my book buying habit and depleting account balance every month, the discovery of flipkart one fine day while browsing in office came as a welcome boon in my life. I introduced many to the website before the latest ads even came on TV recently.

I have tried many an online bookstores like Coinjoos, Landmarkonthenet, Crosswordbookstores, Indiaplaza, Infibeam but the service that i have got out of Flipkart has always made it the hero in my online purchase. My first online purchase was on flipkart and considering how till few years back ordering online was always a question mark in your head, i had finally taken the plunge with flipkart.

Since then flipkart supremacy in the book selling business has in many a ways given re - birth to the many staid and old websites of various bookstores and they all seem to now get the idea as to how flipkart has in a single handed manner changed the entire book buying business and moved a lot of people from bookstores to the online buying habit and they are therefore aggressively moving into the business as well. But having said that and having tested many of them flipkart continues to rule everyone's mind because their service is top class and the sheer length of their collection. a quick tick on the great stuff about flipkart

• The most important fact is their collection and that anything and everything that you can possibly search or look for and 9 times out of 10 will never find in your local bookstore will always be available with them. If not available you can always leave a request on their site and they very very promptly get back to you as they have it.
• They have great prices to offer. one of the first few guys to offer cash on delivery along with the regular modes of transaction.
• Upcoming launches always land on their website first before any other.
• impeccable service, never any delays in any deliveries and if any then very timely information sent to the customer.
• customer service is available, helpful, not cranky and seems to sort out issues in a very streamlined manner.
• i also happened to get a wrong book once from them and it was a little harrowing to call them many a times but they did finally after many apologies get it picked up from me and refund the money in my account so i could order the right one.

All in all for me flipkart's been like a magic wand. This in no way indicates that i have stopped going to a bookstore. Visiting a bookstore and spending time amongst books has always been one of my favourite pastime and it will remain so but yes it does help to save a hell lot of money and also play with the range of books they have.

Off late they have forayed into other categories but i do feel that it's going to be a while before they get at par in those categories compared to other websites like Indiaplaza and all which have been older and specialist websites for things like electronics, etc. But their book business is commendable.

Cheers to Flipkart and i hope you guys keep up the good work...

Image courtesy: Google

Uzeb and Zuber

so one sad saturday morning i had to be on shoot at 7 am in the morning. First a weekend and then reporting for a shoot that early in the morning is like mid night for me. So well all groggy i reach the shoot and it all begins. While i am sitting and watching the first shot being taken i see 2 very cute little boys sitting next to me and enjoying the shoot... and that was the beginning of a day long friend ship with two super smart and super cute kids..

Uzeb and Zuber were two kid models for my shoot. Zuber was the earlier choice for the lead kid model and then at the shoot we realise he is not fitting the bill so his younger brother Uzeb is the one we go with. While Uzeb is happy and doing his kiddy running around, Zuber is visibly upset that he is not a part of the shoot anymore.. I feel extremely upset seeing him upset. trying to find ways to talk to him but he is not talking to anyone. goes away to one corner and sits on the steps ... I with slow and steady determination inch towards him and finally manage to crack him open.. and then from using my Deo to telling me about his dream to buy a cycle to how upset he was to who all he had in his family continued and then a day long chitter chatter with both the boys and my groggy day turned into a fun little session of sorts with them..Both the boys extremely intelligent..

Sometime in the day their parents also come to the shoot. Zuber comes and points at them and tells me - there my Ammi and Abbu. I look at them and see them busy having their lunch so I turn away.. Eventually in the evening his dad gets talking to me.. They are this humble couple who are there to support their kids and just anxious about not leaving them alone for their first such shoot.. So i get talking with them. Thier dad is a Taxi driver and mum a house wife. He tells me about his three kids.. so both the boys have an elder brother as well who they tell me has just gotten selected to meet Irfan Pathan and few others from the Indian cricket team and has been selected to play at the state level. But that requires for the parents to shell out about Rs 1 lakh and he says thats not something he can afford. He tells me that he would really get annoyed with his son for going and playing cricket because somewhere that worry of not being able to support this hobby of his son eventually would always bother him, But the son went ahead and followed his dreams and reached to a point where the father is left with no option. So he has left every thing to 'Malik' and says he will figure some way out for sure.. I find this man for the humble background that he comes from, to be extremely modern and broadminded in thoughts. He believes his kids can do every thing and they are intelligent enough and all he can do is support them in the right ways and teach them to be humble and all the right disciplines of life..

Zuber he tells me is suffering from acute asthama and so looks 8yrs old when he is actually 13. I am shocked because he really doesn't look that old. An amount of Rs 90,000 has been spent in his treatment from various hospitals like Lilawati to Tata memorial.. every possible good big hospital one can think of.. but nothing much has come out of it..So in True style his father leaves every thing to " allah" .. "I am doing every thing i can and i think my prayers have been answered to some extent as you can today see him walking around in this shoot when 2 months back he was bed ridden and i had left all hopes in him even surviving this ordeal".. I Smile.. i feel happy that i get to see Zuber in this happy state..

Uzeb..is the naughty super intelligent child who the father thinks is going to make him very very proud. He says to run a family of 3 kids with his humble salary of taxi driving is not easy but i don't complain.. All i know is that my aim is to do every thing that i can to make my children's life better in this world and i think my job is done.. From there on God will take over and what the almighty has decided for them they have to live through that and make their own world.

The end of the day makes me feel so good to meet such great parents and the 2 little vibrant happy kids. I pray for them before i leave. thank the 2 kids and bid good bye's but the 4 faces - Uzeb, Zuber and his parents don't leave me.. i have not stopped thinking about them and every time i think about them it brings a smile on my face.. to meet such warm and positive people only makes you feel life is so much more worth all the things that we think are trouble.. :)

Image Source: Google

Udaan - A Joy Ride!!

Much has been written about Udaan..

I finally got down to writing about the movie but more from a sense of a known that it makes me feel.. the soundtrack of the movie, it’s lyrics brilliantly weave in a whole lot of emotions.. a varied range of emotions from the adolescent qualms that on goes through, the disconnect one feels with parents at times, the bond that one has with their friends in school.. the relationships that you try to keep at while you are at your rebellious best..the lyrics just create magic.. Simple but says so much..

Pairon ki bediyan khwabon ko baandhe nahi re, kabhi nahi re
Mitti ki parton ko nanne se ankur bhi cheeray, dheere dheere

The every new and next stage in life that we enter into, the lyrics below exactly define the anxiety, dilemma that we go through at the beginning of each of these stages:

Kahani khatam hai ya shuruwaat hone ko hai
Subha nayi hai yeh ya phir raat hone ko hai

Aane wala waqt dega panha hai
Ya phir se milenge do raahein
Khabar kya, kya pataa

I feel you make your best friends while you are in school.. whether you eventually end up keeping in touch with them or not due to life that strikes you in your 20’s but the fact is that the memory of those friendship’s will always bring a smile to your face.. you explore relationships in that age with complete purity of heart and innocent conflicts.. you grow together to face the newer challenges everyday.. it’s all about being there for each other and hopefully if you do manage to be in touch with them then you sure have a bunch of friends for life.. Rohan’s friendship with his 3 other buddies who together get thrown out of the school is one for keeps.. I love the relationship specially that he shares with his friend Maninder in the film.. They seem to perfectly well understand each other in their own way..

The charm of living in a small town is a world apart from the concrete jungle.. the movie made me nostalgic because it reminded me of my childhood in Digboi and it reminds me of my winter trips with my college friends to Jamshedpur..you live life in these towns.. have time to do everything that you possibly can include in a day of 24 hrs..

Arjun, Rohan’s stepbrother is the most natural kid on the block that I have seen in my long run of Hindi movies.. I have never seen a kid who seamlessly fits in to the character in the age that he is in..he probably was the star for me in the movie..

All in all Udaan was a brilliant, quiet, sensitive, fun, nice, feel good, soothing experience, one which I thoroughly enjoyed..

Week Ends!!

Weekend is here.. Waiting for Friday already.. Oh finally.. tonight’s gonna be a good good night..What is it that makes weekend and working population best friends..

With Increasing work pressure and no life culture specially in India where the more you work the better you are at your job is the IN THING.. Weekend ought to be that one thing that everyone looks forward to. Be it going for a short trip out of town or mostly just sleeping for hours on end through Saturday and Sunday or going bonkers with the drinking session with friends.. or watching loads of movies.. or line up outside restaurants for hours to just have that one meal with family..It’s THE WEEKEND that we look forward to..

I guess for the over worked population this is the time to finally breath.. GOD FORBID if you are working the weekend then you are doomed for 2 week long straight up no break stint.. and that one sucks for sure..

Today at 5:40 on a Friday evening I can’t wait to get out, get out of office, get out of town.. get out to forget I exist in this life even and lead another life altogether even if it’s for a tiny 2 days J

So Weekend here I come and mine this time is going to be the garfeild slump Lump Kinds.. Oh so perfect!!!!!!!!!!!!